I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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