your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
