dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
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You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
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My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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