I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
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I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
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I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....