Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
