Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
