And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
