Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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