I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
