I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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