Three words: puerto rican gang bang
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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