what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
