so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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