its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
