I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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