So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I need a beard to bite.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
