I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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