There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
