We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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