I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
