Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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