You're so nebulous sometimes
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
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I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
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Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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