Sponge bath it is.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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