Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
