I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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