i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
