yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize