Kareoke will never be a sober sport
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize