Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
