the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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