Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
