He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
