my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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