This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize