let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
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Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
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It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize