good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
