Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
