Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(714): View more from California

Ikea night.

(949): View more from California

?

(714): View more from California

Insert tab A into swedish slot B

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(415): View more from California

If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over

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(913): View more from Kansas

I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(502): View more from Kentucky

I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...

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(856): View more from New Jersey

she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.

(812): View more from Indiana

That makes no sense, but good luck

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