went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
