My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
