If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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