i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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