Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
