I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
