I think im going to throw up on grandma
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
