I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
