she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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