yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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