She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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