obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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