That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
